This was supposed to an easy run. We’re in the lovely taper phase of our training. We run shorter distances. We give our bodies a chance to rest up and strengthen before the big day. We relax a little. Yet here I was, struggling as if it were January and I was just starting again. I wanted to stop at every block. My legs were literally lead weights. My breath and heart rate were way too fast. But I didn’t stop. I kept going. And that’s how I know I’ve learned to run. It was almost as if stopping wasn’t an option no matter how much my body wanted to stop and turn around. And while I know there will be more tough runs, I also know that there will be more good runs too. I also know that come race day, these bad runs will be a distant memory when I cross that finish line. T-minus two weeks.
11 Comments
...is the one between here and here," said my friend to me on Friday night as she pointed from one ear to the other. And while I did think of that mantra over and over after my run yesterday, I really think that the longest miles I've run are the ones up Terwilleger Blvd. It meant that on the longest run of our training (over 11 miles!), I basically ran up to, and past, OHSU. Yes, the hospital up on the hill!! It was a slow and steady run for me, with the operative word being slow. But I think that Terwilliger is a right of passage for anyone who calls themselves a runner in Portland...which somehow, I think I might be!
There's been a lull in my training. Traveling internationally throws off all the normal routines and then adding in a little food poisoning really wreaks some havoc on training. So despite getting in some training runs this past week, I was more than a little terrified by the 9 mile run scheduled for this morning--especially when I was certain that they would be sending us up Terwilliger.
So it was a great relief when I found out that I'd be running on my home turf--THE EASTSIDE! A nice loop up Hawthorne and down Belmont. As I began the run, my nerves settled down and I began to get into a rhythm (tough to believe that I may actually have a running rhythm!). There was the bread stacked in the window of Grand Central Bakery, the temptation of stealing an orange from the produce market on 23rd & Hawthorne, the girl running to catch the bus in a bright pink jumpsuit that made her look like the Easter Bunny, the sign in a store window that said "Make Art Not War," the line-up of hungry Portlanders at Pine State Biscuits, the flowers being sold outside Zupan's, the heavy smoke hanging in the air from the crew hanging outside the methadone clinic and the return to Grand Avenue with its usual traffic. After some encouraging words from Coach Jen & Coach Karl at the final aid station, the goosebumps happened. The tall, healthy barefoot 20-something guy that was grabbing a drink of water after what I assume was a morning run of his own shouted at me (noticing my TNT jersey), "Did you run the Race for the Cure for the Lymphoma Society?" "No, I'm training for a different event." "I'm a survivor, thanks." All I could must was a meager "you're welcome" and continue on my way. And the goosebumps came and went for the rest of the run. Thank you for all of your continuing encouragement and support--it's not for me but for those survivors among us. It was cold and windy and rainy this morning when I woke up. And after only two training runs this week, I wasn't excited about the prospect of going for a SEVEN mile run. But then I checked my email and with some checks being entered into the system late yesterday, I realized that I was over my fundraising goal!! Both Karly and I have already exceeded our goal due to so many people providing incredible support. It was enough to boost my spirits and get me moving when I would have much rather stayed in a warm & toasty bed. Our run was along the waterfront again and the first half of the run was, well, cold and windy and rainy. As I plodded along, wishing I had a baseball cap on to block the rain from eyes, I was thinking how it was pretty incredible it was that this was the first really rainy run that I've been on. Plus, there were easily 200 other runners out along the waterfront--not only Team in Training but all the other very hardy Portland runners who go out rain or shine. And so I just kept going, past the lovely warm smells coming from the Portland Saturday Market food booths, past my old Enron stomping grounds and past the other cold runners. On my way back, when the rain took a merciful respite, a long train hauling military tanks and rigs was crossing the Steel Bridge, heading in the opposite direction as I was: It felt like a scene from a war movie--the battle preparations were just beginning and nobody was quite sure how it would end--except of course that after the struggle, their side would be victorious. And so, after completing the longest run of my life (so far), I feel battle ready. Ready to take on more rainy runs. Ready to take on more miles. Ready to keep training for all those families who would much rather have to go for a measly run in the rain than fight such an ugly disease. And ready to believe that our side will be the victorious one.
My life is rough. I "had" to spend the week in Monterey for a customer conference. This involved seeing the sunrise out my window over the Monterey Bay, falling asleep to the sound of the waves, drinking some California vino, and of course doing some networking! It also meant that I had a change of scenery for running! It also prepared me for a six mile run yesterday morning--not as fun to run without Karly but I can't believe that I ran a full six miles on my own!! Thanks for the continued words of encouragement!!
Karly got to have a quick over night in Portland...and so we got to run SIX miles together today! Almost half of our race-day distance, woo-hoo!!
The GAP is offering 30% off through Sunday and giving 5% of proceeds to LLS! And who says corporations are evil?! Just take the coupon from the link below into any GAP, Banana Republic or Old Navy!
http://www.gapinc.com/giveandget/lls/ I completed my first "race" since starting the training program...the Shamrock 5k, complete with the slow incline all the way up Broadway. But my training is paying off and I was dying like in past years! Thanks to the Katich's and the Maloney's for running together...and for the mimosas afterwards!
I'm not a stranger to loss. I attended funerals in high school and felt my extended family grow smaller with time. But the loss of Hunter this week is a different loss than I've ever experienced. He was three & a half and fought cancer for two and half years of his short, short life. I'm not a parent but it doesn't take much imagination to begin to understand the darkness that Hunter's family is experiencing. This morning before our run, we took time to honor Hunter and one of our coaches read the following passage aloud to the whole team, which is from the blog that Hunter's family kept of their journey:
With all of that said - we are continuing to love on Hunter like never before. We are drowning him in kisses and holding him and squeezing him tight every single second we get. I tickle and smooch his tiny, little toes constantly. I look him deep into his eyes and make sure that he understands when I tell him that mom and dad love him so deeply and that we will ALWAYS be with him, loving him, cherishing him and applauding his amazing and courageous efforts.....wherever he is. We try to get him to smile as many times as we possibly can and are constantly figuring out ways to make his time left the most enjoyable and the most memorable......for all of us. I guess I should take back the fact that I no longer believe in miracles. The fact that we had Hunter in our life for as long as we did was a miracle in itself. Zen has said several times and I definitely agree........We wouldn't take our time with Hunter back. He has made us better people, he has shown us love that is so deep and so fulfilling and so completely rewarding. He's made us stronger individuals and he's brought immeasurable joy into our lives. Joy that we would have never experienced without him. He has truly made our lives worth living. Zen has also reminded me that this time that we have left with him is a gift. A beautiful, beautiful gift. We know that the end is near and we now get to cherish him with every ounce of our souls. To counter the heartbreak, we got to hear from a Dad who has a very different story. His son Evan was celebrating his 9th birthday. Evan was diagnosed with AAL at age three and is now a survivor. The look on the Dad's face, describing how he would have done anything, anything to trade places with his sick kid at the time and how joyous a birthday is now was priceless. With your support, we hope that there will only be stories like Evan's. So thank you for helping Karly and I try to make a little difference. Our team now has the picture below pinned to our jerseys for training of Hunter. His smile is one of the toughest I've ever seen. Please join me in sending love and prayers to Hunter's family. It is with great sadness that I post that our Honored Teammate, Hunter, lost his battle with cancer on Tuesday night. Little Hunter was a fighter but he had been struggling for a long time and I can only hope that he has found peace now. This news is obviously heartbreaking. Hunter, and all of the kiddos and families facing such tragedies, are the reason that we are running and fundraising. His family told the TNT staff that they found strength and hope knowing that we were out there fighting for him. So thank you for your support--your funds and words of support are making a difference. Together, we are relentless for a cure.
Here's some inspiration: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HuoVM9nm42E XOXO |
KourtneyTheme Song: Livin' On a Prayer Archives
May 2010
CategoriesLinksHonored Teammate Hunter
Healing Hunter Family Friend Kate Kate Arnold Sean & Bonnie TNT Blog TNT Inspired |